Calogero Vizzini, Al Capone, Luky Luciano & TaterTot

An article I read recently titled Baby makes 3: How kids rattle friendships had the section copied below, which I found hilarious:

Beware the 'mommy mafia'
Happily childfree by choice, Lisa Giassa, a 35-year-old public relations executive who lives in Bergen County, N.J., saw many of her friends get sucked into what she calls “the mommy mafia. All they do is talk — more like complain — about their kids, their husbands, dramas with teachers and other mommy mafia members,” says Giassa.

She has few friends left who have children and cherishes the ones she calls “me-first moms.” Me-first moms, she said, nurture friendships, while members of the mommy mafia are more likely to go months without calling. “It's as if they became incapable of doing anything that didn't fit their ideal of what a mommy should be and do. It just became too much effort and I began to ask what am I getting from these friendships? What am I giving? Then I realized we just grew apart. So it was time to find new friends.”

A dictionary of the Italian language describes mafia as: "A complex of small clandestine associations governed by a code of silence and being in control of some business activities and of party patronage in the administration of the Region of Sicily".

If our families or children are considered our “business” there are few days any of us would boast we felt in control, while my pal Jenny is Italian I don’t believe she’s Sicilian so that’s not applicable, and the phrase “code of silence” is laughable as we’re not silent about anything. Usually you can’t get us to shut-up.

I’m not sure if I would be considered a “Me-First-Mom” or a member of the “Mommy Mafia”. I would guess a bit of both. The majority of my friends and all of my closest friends are also mothers so it’s hard for me to gauge how we may come across to the childless. I will admit when I have gone out with a group of Mom’s in the past I know I have grown inpatient with story after story after story about what their kid may or may not have done since I saw them last. I can't imagine how much it may suck to someone without kids listening to an hour-long story about how my three-year old navigated potty training. While I like to brag up my kids as much as the next gal, it can get tiresome after a while even mother to mother. I have wondered if some women I know are able to define themselves outside of being a mother (there’s my judgemental side again).

If we are part of an underground Mommy Mafia, then I want to assign the following titles to my "family":

Bombadee as Capo Crimine - The head of the family, usually reigning as a dictator, sometimes called the "don", or "godfather”. Level headed and cool under pressue, but knows when it’s necessary to order a hit. Offering information on an as-needed basis, she trusts few and keeps her enemies under a watchful eye.

Mrs. BlahZeeBlah as Consigliere - Consigliere is an advisor to the family. They are often low profile gangsters that can be trusted. They are used as a mediator of disputes or representatives or aids in meetings with other Families. They often keep the Family looking as legitimate as possible. They usually do not have crew of their own, but still wield great power in the Family.

TaterTot as Capo di Tutti Capi – “Boss of all Bosses” of course. After all, this is my blog and according to Bombadee I get to be the coolest person on my blog.

So what are you; a “Me-First-Mom” or member of the “Mommy Mafia”?