We think a lot alike sometimes, Dr. Phil and I. An excerpt from his show:
"Maybe you just need to kind of lighten up a little bit and realize that there's not going to be a perfect connection. You're not going to meet a perfect guy. You're not a perfect mate. It's just an imperfect union between two willing spirits. And that's a good place to be. You're not chasing or retreating, it's just an imperfect union between two people who say, 'I'd rather be in a relationship and share my life, share my joys, share my fun, share my activities, share my life than do it alone.' And you don't have to have a man in your life to be good, healthy, whole and complete. But if you want that, you've got to give yourself permission to take it with the flaws and fallacies that come with it."
"And take a chance on getting hurt," she surmises.
"No, no, there's not a chance that you're going to get hurt. Let me guarantee you," says Dr. Phil. "Even a well-intended guy is going to hurt his partner. I know; I've seen me do it. I'll guarantee you, if you get in a relationship with a guy, you are going to get hurt. So?"
"So I have to take more chances I guess," says Suzie.
"You're going to get hurt," he continues. "You just have to decide that you are durable enough, that you have enough confidence in yourself that you can handle that."
"Maybe you just need to kind of lighten up a little bit and realize that there's not going to be a perfect connection. You're not going to meet a perfect guy. You're not a perfect mate. It's just an imperfect union between two willing spirits. And that's a good place to be. You're not chasing or retreating, it's just an imperfect union between two people who say, 'I'd rather be in a relationship and share my life, share my joys, share my fun, share my activities, share my life than do it alone.' And you don't have to have a man in your life to be good, healthy, whole and complete. But if you want that, you've got to give yourself permission to take it with the flaws and fallacies that come with it."
"And take a chance on getting hurt," she surmises.
"No, no, there's not a chance that you're going to get hurt. Let me guarantee you," says Dr. Phil. "Even a well-intended guy is going to hurt his partner. I know; I've seen me do it. I'll guarantee you, if you get in a relationship with a guy, you are going to get hurt. So?"
"So I have to take more chances I guess," says Suzie.
"You're going to get hurt," he continues. "You just have to decide that you are durable enough, that you have enough confidence in yourself that you can handle that."
3 comments:
It just reminds me of my parents' favorite retort to any of my complaints "Well toots, life is hard."
I like to think of it in a more "no nonsense, bring it on" way.
"Well toots, life can be hard, but I know you're ready for it."
Or, as the wisest person I've ever known often says to me:
Buck up cupcake.
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